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I am scared of saying anything
Dear Massi, I am 19-year-old girl and I am in a relationship with a slighty older guy from London.
I have been going out with this guy since 2005 and we both are deeply in love and have feelings for each other.
The thing is that he has told all his family about me and they are happy and I speak to them regularly. They are such a nice family but I don't know how to tell my family as I am scared I dont know how to face this situation up to them.?
So please can you help me
S
MASSI SAYS
If your family is very traditional then I would ask his family to contact yours when you are ready for the next step, engagement or marriage.
If you have a good relationship with either of your parents I would approach them first so they can help you when the subject arises.
Alternatively there is nothing better than the help and support of a sibling, be it brother or sister.
Talk to them or a friend and enlist their help. This way you can bring the subject up with your family. Remember your family only want for you to be happy-so be patient with them.
10:03am Wednesday 23rd April 2008
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CommentPosted by: Great Harwooder, Lancs on 5:23pm Mon 28 Apr 08
Your family will be horrified to hear that his family members have been communicating with you. The longer you leave telling your family, the worse it will get. Tell them yourself, or if you're traditional get a relative to tell them that a party is interested in their daughter (i.e. you).
Your family will be horrified to hear that his family members have been communicating with you. The longer you leave telling your family, the worse it will get. Tell them yourself, or if you're traditional get a relative to tell them that a party is interested in their daughter (i.e. you).
Posted by: zarina, west yorkshire on 11:37pm Mon 5 May 08
It's a good thing that you have going on so dont let it slip. Be brave have a bit of courage and tell your family, but be prepared for the wrse and tthink about what you are going to do if they disagree.
It's a good thing that you have going on so dont let it slip. Be brave have a bit of courage and tell your family, but be prepared for the wrse and tthink about what you are going to do if they disagree.
Posted by: nadeem, lancashire on 10:10pm Wed 7 May 08
oh dear! oh dear! I can't believe what I read, I mean only very recently I have been in the same situaion, except I was that slightly older guy. As per the suggestion, I told her the same things, I told her to speak to her mother or brother, she has no sisters, anyways the problem was, I have been divorced, now she some how managed to tell her mum about me but she never told her about my divorce, I insisted on having a personal meeting with her mum, so I could explain things to her but she couldn't arrange a meeting. The point I am trying to get to is, specially to the girl, You need to know how strong is your relationship with the guy, once you are confident that he is the one then you need ask yourself how far could you go to get this person in your life, and if you think you can't stand your grounds and can't go agains't your family then I suggest please call the whole thing off now and please don't put the poor guy through misery and bareless pain because trust me I've experienced that and I am still in pain but in my case, I am not willing to give up, because I love her very much and I am confident that we will have an excellent life together, but even at this stage it is my intention to get her family's blessings. so sister only make the move if you are willing to go all the way through it and be strong because your family will put you through all sorts of emotional blackmail, which unfortunately I will say, is only dailogues but nothing takes place practically. so my advice, its your life and if you are matured and confident about you man then go and live your life regardless of what comes in your way. I wish all the best wishes and best of the luck to you.
oh dear! oh dear! I can't believe what I read, I mean only very recently I have been in the same situaion, except I was that slightly older guy. As per the suggestion, I told her the same things, I told her to speak to her mother or brother, she has no sisters, anyways the problem was, I have been divorced, now she some how managed to tell her mum about me but she never told her about my divorce, I insisted on having a personal meeting with her mum, so I could explain things to her but she couldn't arrange a meeting. The point I am trying to get to is, specially to the girl, You need to know how strong is your relationship with the guy, once you are confident that he is the one then you need ask yourself how far could you go to get this person in your life, and if you think you can't stand your grounds and can't go agains't your family then I suggest please call the whole thing off now and please don't put the poor guy through misery and bareless pain because trust me I've experienced that and I am still in pain but in my case, I am not willing to give up, because I love her very much and I am confident that we will have an excellent life together, but even at this stage it is my intention to get her family's blessings. so sister only make the move if you are willing to go all the way through it and be strong because your family will put you through all sorts of emotional blackmail, which unfortunately I will say, is only dailogues but nothing takes place practically. so my advice, its your life and if you are matured and confident about you man then go and live your life regardless of what comes in your way. I wish all the best wishes and best of the luck to you.
Posted by: 19-year-old girl's DAD, London on 4:30pm Wed 25 Jun 08
POODINI! think we no find out, well you bastara know i get you, you go pakishtan and marry your cousin, he good boy, not like london boy. all will be ok
POODINI! think we no find out, well you bastara know i get you, you go pakishtan and marry your cousin, he good boy, not like london boy. all will be ok
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